Rasa macam tak ikhlas buat semua ni, rasa tak ikhlas nak meng’ikhlas’ kan bende yang tak patut. Rasa berdosa sebab terpaksa berpura-pura macam ikhlas. Rasa macam nak jerit, wa sedap korag guna duit aku, harap korang sume tak balik dah, boleh? Rasa berdosa tu tetap ada, tapi I am not an angel, jauh sekali umat yang ‘maksum’.
Biarlah semua ni nanti jadi perkara yang lebih baik pada masa akan datang. Biarlah suatu hari nanti I will go away from here tanpa tanpa rasa dendam. Tanpa rasa bersalah, tanpa benci. Rasa macam nak pergi sekarang tapi ada 1001 alasan yang tak boleh diketepikan, yang terpaksa di hadapi.
An organization needs a good leader also a good team player, if not it will fall. Leader if he failed to lead, he will fail for whole life. Sometimes age doesn’t show the maturity. It only a number stands for the year you own. The age of 20 plus only show the less matured globally, nothing much more, no improvement at all.
Those people goes globally, do things beyond thinking, do improvement outsides the boxes so that their company could move.
If you are a leader you have to know where you are stand to. Bukan setakat dengar cakap orang yang kau suka and then bila diorang buat salah which you cannot accept, hate them for life time. Should hate yourself because put trust on them too much. Suara orang yang tak reti bodek di ketepikan atas unsur – unsur peribadi. At the end, no one will stand for you if you fail. You will face this alone and regretting past time.
Bila nak seronok-seronok ada puak yang diperlukan. Bila ada kerja urgent ada balaci yang di perlukan. Alhamdulillah, I am not balaci. I am doing my tasks and that’s all. I dunno how to bodek but I know how to do my work well. If one day I am out of here, I know that I will survive. I believe in myself. I know I can do it. BUT, do not take granted on me. I have my limits. If I leave, I will leave forever. Aku tak pernah lagila jilat balik ludah aku so far.
Jangan ingat what you all give to me make me stay. Di suruh itu ini. Before this, I memang tak pernah merungut but this one happen when my daughter sick. She is really sick and plus I was in 36 weeks pregnany, already yang dah tak larat.
The question will go ‘datang tak esok’. ‘Are you in the office?’ Wah wah wah. Why questions like ‘Are your daugher well?’ ‘How was she?’ takde? HARAM! Takpela hari ni hari korang kan! I was like super exhausted because have to stay up ikut schedule makan ubat anak and Tuesday nite Marsya shaking all over which make me cried all night. Macam- macam fikir dalam kepala ni, I will lost myself if anything happen to her ever!
The next day, I terus pergi Colombia. She got really high fever, padahal dia dah makan ubat and we are already buat check up kat Klinik Ding last Monday morning.
Honestly, I am frustrated, regret why I have to stuck with this s----- people!!!! They are s----- but I am not! Even I memaki by using bad words already.
Perempuan jenis apa yang sanggup tinggalkan anak-anak dan suami dan pergi berhibur dan suka-suka??? Rasanya perempuan jenis apa? Masa kau nak pergi, ada kau fikir kau nak bagi kerja kau kat siapa? Ada? I hope that Allah will show all of you a better way and also for a better way for me: TO GET OUT FROM HERE!
May daughter is sick, I am in deep terrible emotion and nobody cares. Kerja walau gaji beribu-ribu tapi if my family tak sihat, tak happy and I am not happy, what is the point? Emosi pada masa ni teruk! Anak yang sakit dan sangat susah hati, ditambah pula emak yang sakit juga. Mak dapat high blood pressure and tumit dia sakit, tpi dia still datang jugak to my house to take care of Marsya sebab I have to go to office to because all of them wasn’t in the office. Went for some s--- trip ke whatever. Aku bukan dengki dan tak ingin ke tempat korang pergi tu tapi aku kena masuk kerja hari ini sebab benda b----!
(CRIED!!!!!) Kesian kat mak yang kena datang jugak. Dahla masa kecik pun mak yang jaga masa sakit, ini dah ada anak pun, mak kena datang jagakan? (CRIED.......!!!)
I hope Allah akan balas semua perbuatan korang hari ini kat aku.
I am not an angel, jauh sekali maksum!
